Suggestions as to Approach for Witness

Anonymous · Post by **Anonymous** » Thu Oct 21, 2004 11:46 am

Hi all. I'd like to ask a question/get some suggestions on behalf of my wife who is convicted that she must witness to her long/time/childhood best friend. Her friend is an unbeliever, despite being married to a Christian man and has a believing teenage son.

From conversation we have had with her husband, her main obstacle seems to be related to a basic cynicism about human nature. You see, she works for the State Parole Board, and spent many years as a parole officer. She has seen time and time again coversions for the benefit parole board, but back to their old ways as soon as released.
She is prone to defenses such as "people will say they belive what others want to hear if it will get them something"
Or upon the example of her family and friends "it's ok if thats what you need, but I don't need it."
She sees all religions, Christianity included, as man made psychologial constructs.

I have only came to faith in the last few years, through a gradual process of intellectual examination, evidence of God working in my life through prayer, and culminating in conviction of my sin, confession, and asking God for the gift of faith to allow Jesus to save me and the Holy Spirit to enter my life. I had to really want the faith to belive and ask God for it.

My wife, though, is one of those who has never really questioned her belief, having had a relationship with Christ since childhood. Of course she has, and still does fail at times as we all do, she has never really doubted and had a simple "I belive and that's that" state of mind. She says that since she has never really doubted the Gospel, she has trouble witnessing to others, as she can't really remeber a time when she did not belive. She is very concerned for her friend. I can only offer my experience as a 2 yr old Christian. My wife and her friend are taking a weekend trip together in 2 weeks. I will not be along.

Any ideas from mature Christians would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Whit

BavarianWheels · Post by **BavarianWheels** » Thu Oct 21, 2004 11:56 am

.
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I find it somewhat comical that your wife's friend would base her belief (or lack thereof) of religion on the example of criminals...especially knowing the reasoning behind their supposed conversion. (I do realize some are genuine)

However, I too share in her "misery" somewhat as I too am a Christian "from birth."
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Anonymous · Post by **Anonymous** » Thu Oct 21, 2004 12:16 pm

Not only on the disingenious conversions, but on the gulibility of well-intentioned Christians who get appointed to a term on the board.

She would not acknowledge a genuine conversion, only a successful effort by the the parolee to stay out of trouble. She says she has seen no correlation between recidivism and whether or not the inmate "found Jesus" in prison.

IMO her objections are mainly due to good old selfish human pride in her intellect and abilities, same as me for most of my life. But that's not an observation to lay on you best friend seems to me. If someone did that to me I'd have thown that "mote in your own eye" verse back so fast it would make your head swim. She does not want to aleinate the friend she loves but encourage her to seek God and eternal life and avoid that other place.

Kurieuo · Post by **Kurieuo** » Thu Oct 21, 2004 8:00 pm

I think you actually have a lot going for you here in reaching our to your wife's friend if her husband is a Christian. Yet, I don't think your wife should see it as her "duty" to "make" her friend come to Christ, as this is really her friends decision and your wife's responsibility ends at this point. What I am saying is that one should be aware that spreading the light of gospel is our duty as Christians, yet it isn't our job to make someone else swallow it. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. She shouldn't feel resposible for the latter.

I got involved in a relationship and my partner (current) wasn't a Christian. At about the same time, I only begun learning reasons for my Christianity. As I gradually became learned and understood more, I challenged my partner's assumptions and kept trying to show her things I'd find on the Internet I thought was really great evidence for God and against the sola naturalism which dominated her perspective. About three years later she came to Church, and as the speaker spoke she was convicted and finally had clarity on Christ being a reality, and she came to Christ. An Alpha course was also helpful as it helped her to understand where the Bible came from, how reliable it was, Christ's claims and so forth.

Anyway I share this because your wife's friend's husband is a Christian. So he could perhaps follow a similar path I did... bringing things up all the time about God. I was really surprised that what I was saying about God was really sinking in considering the obstinate and argumentory reaction I always received. The Alpha course, where you have dinners and so forth while discussing issues pertaining to Christianity, was also good for helping my partner to understand the truth. If possible, perhaps you guys could source one out, and then invite them along to it? Just some thoughts...

Kurieuo.

Anonymous · Post by **Anonymous** » Fri Oct 22, 2004 7:42 am

Thanks Kurieuo.

Anonymous · Post by **Anonymous** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 5:56 am

HEREIN IS A MARVELOUS THING: (all caps to get your attention!!)

Wherefore the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ, that we might be justified by faith. Gal 3:24

If your wife wants to bring her friend to the Messiah do what the Bible says works best - use the law! It is our schoolmaster (or teacher) that brings us to Christ because it sets a thirst in our hearts for righteousness. When you take the time to bring out the nature of the divine law, God considers lust as adultery of the heart and hatred as murder; when you take the time to gently share the truth in love, that if anyone has told a lie or stolen before they are a lying thief in God's eyes; when you take the time to warn about the consequences of sin (John 3:18) and their eternal destination to be justly sealed in Hell, then your wife's friend will realize her desperate need for the righteousness that can only be found in Jesus Christ.

Sinners drink in iniquity like water Job 15:16 and pacify their consciences by reason that if there was a God, He would forgive them for their errors; after all they are basically a good person and haven't killed anyone! But the Law reveals the terrible alligator beneath the murky pool of sin waiting to snap it's victim and bring it to a cold, watery grave. But if God is good Mark 10:18 then He must by His very nature punish sin with justice! If He is absolutely Holy 1 Peter 1:16 then he will seek out the dark blotches of sin wherever they are found and rid them from His presence like a judge thundering his gavel down riding the world of a lying, thieving, blasphemous, murderous, adulter at heart.

YOU NEED JESUS. The law makes it clear of this. You'll need His righteousness on the day of wrath. Their conscience will testify of this truth when spoken Romans 2:15 .

If you'd like to learn how to use the law in evangelism, visit http://www.livingwaters.com/listenwatch.shtml
and listen to Hell's Best Kept Secret. It's the message that Satan doesn't want you to get a hold of.

What shall we say then? Is the law sin? God forbid. Nay, I had not known sin, but by the law: for I had not known lust, F25 except the law had said, Thou shalt not covet. Romans 7:7

Now we know that what things soever the law saith, it saith to them who are under the law: that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty F14 before God. 20 Therefore by the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight: for by the law is the knowledge of sin. Rom 3:19, 20

Jac3510 · Post by **Jac3510** » Wed Oct 27, 2004 8:24 am

I agree with what everone has said. I just wanted to point to a page here at the website:

Going to Heaven Are We?

As PremoMD pointed out, people need to want Jesus. They have to know their need for them . . . that requires showing them the way God sees them.

This approach might work well, anyway, considering your wife's friend's position. She is well aware that people are evil by nature . . . so, ask her what a Just and Holy God is to do with such a person. Walk through the Law, and show the grace of Christ. If this woman has any children, that will just make it easy. As evil as people are, God still loves us as she loves her child. Wouldn't she do whatever it takes to be with her kids? Same with God . . . even though we are evil by nature, God still loves us and offers us forgiveness. But, you know all that. I'm just rambling now.

Oh yeah, and pray

God bless