obliviousdream wrote:Hey, everyone. I'm new here, obviously, but I wanted to ask about faith. I'm really scared that I'm not doing something right, because I believe Jesus died and rose to let us get into heaven. But I don't feel right >_>
I was raised as a Christian, but when my mother moved away from my Grandparents, I found out she was Agnostic (For her own reasons that I'm aware of, and don't really want to get into on this forum. No offence) But, since then, I haven't been to church in a while, and I think my view of Christianity got warped a little. Then I rediscovered godandscience.org, and it seriously helped me want to reaffirm my faith, and try to walk with God, and be a good Christian.
I just, for the life of me, can't feel like I'm actually with him. I feel disgusting and vile >_> and I don't think that he'd want anything to do with me. I've done somethings I'm not very proud of (Nothing wrong with the laws of this world though. 'Cept maybe speeding...but my mom drives fast. I claim heredity.
![Razz :-P](./images/smilies/icon_razz.gif)
)
Anyway, Could someone help me sort this out? I really want to read the bible, and it's actually taking over my language studying (Which really surprises me)
Thanks for listening ^_^
One of the hardest things to accept in our relationships with Christ is the amazing grace that He extends to us. This grace is the most beautiful thing in the world and yet while we are stunned and overwhelmed with it it can also provoke such a sense of shame in us.
If you have read The LIon The Witch and the Wardrobe I think you can see this paradox written in the relationship between Aslan and the children. It speaks many times of the incredible draw that Aslan (a picture of Christ) has toward the children and yet the awful sense of their own inadequacy.
To be honest I would almost be worried if you didn't feel that way now. The more we as Christian realize how sinful we are, how rebellious we are, the more we appreciate that grace.
At the same time, we are often reminded by Satan and his minions of how much we sin and that shame often keeps up from growing in that relationship with Christ. It is at those moments when we need to fall down on our knees and come to the throne of Grace. After all, it was for our sins that Christ died.
I, too, have often felt that way. Charles Spurgeon writes about this often
spurgeon wrote:
Psalm 46:1
Covenant blessings are not meant to be looked at only, but to be appropriated. Even our Lord Jesus is given to us for our present use. Believer, thou dost not make use of Christ as thou oughtest to do. When thou art in trouble, why dost thou not tell him all thy grief? Has he not a sympathizing heart, and can he not comfort and relieve thee? No, thou art going about to all thy friends, save thy best Friend, and telling thy tale everywhere except into the bosom of thy Lord. Art thou burdened with this day's sins? Here is a fountain filled with blood: use it, saint, use it. Has a sense of guilt returned upon thee? The pardoning grace of Jesus may be proved again and again. Come to him at once for cleansing. Dost thou deplore thy weakness? He is thy strength: why not lean upon him? Dost thou feel naked? Come hither, soul; put on the robe of Jesus' righteousness. Stand not looking at it, but wear it. Strip off thine own righteousness, and thine own fears too: put on the fair white linen, for it was meant to wear. Dost thou feel thyself sick? Pull the night-bell of prayer, and call up the Beloved Physician! He will give the cordial that will revive thee. Thou art poor, but then thou hast “a kinsman, a mighty man of wealth.” What! wilt thou not go to him, and ask him to give thee of his abundance, when he has given thee this promise, that thou shalt be joint heir with him, and has made over all that he is and all that he has to be thine? There is nothing Christ dislikes more than for his people to make a show-thing of him, and not to use him. He loves to be employed by us. The more burdens we put on his shoulders, the more precious will he be to us.
“Let us be simple with him, then,
Not backward, stiff, or cold,
As though our Bethlehem could be
What Sinai was of old.”
I have often found him helpful to read.