Computer Geek Humor!!

Got some good and clean jokes to share? Everyone likes a laugh.
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Gman
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Computer Geek Humor!!

#1

Post by Gman » Tue May 18, 2010 4:38 pm

I found this to be rather funny.... :P

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed adistinct slow-down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NHL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed, Desperate
__________________________________________

Dear Desperate,

Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command ithoughtyoulovedme.html, try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If those applications work as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. However, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program as it will download the Gas Passing and Snoring Loudly Beta. Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs avirus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources). In addition, please DO NOT attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. This is an unsupported application and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck!
Technical Support
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Re: Computer Geek Humor!!

#2

Post by zoegirl » Tue May 18, 2010 4:50 pm

:lol: Nice....
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Re: Computer Geek Humor!!

#3

Post by RickD » Tue May 18, 2010 5:26 pm

We have that same system at my house. :pound:
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24 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life.

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Re: Computer Geek Humor!!

#4

Post by Harry12345 » Sun May 30, 2010 1:11 am

Gman wrote: Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs avirus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).
WIN. :clap:
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Re: Computer Geek Humor!!

#5

Post by cslewislover » Sun May 30, 2010 12:48 pm

Lol, that's great.
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Re: Computer Geek Humor!!

#6

Post by SamTHorn » Tue Jun 15, 2010 12:18 pm

Dear Systems Analyst,

I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began Unexpected child processing and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources. This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches itself during Systems initialization, where it monitors all other system activities. Applications such as "Boys' Night Out 2.5 " and "Clubbing 5.3" no longer run, and crash the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate selected "Saturday Soccer 6.3" always fails and "Sunday Shopping 7.1" runs instead. I cannot seem to keep "Wife 1.0" in the background whilst attempting to run any of my favorite applications. I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend 7.0", but un-installing doesn't work on this program.

Can you please help?
###########################3


Dear Customer,

This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding of the functions of the Wife 1.0 program. Many customers upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAM. Actually, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by its Creator to run everything on your current platform.

You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0, as Wife 1.0 was not designed to do this and it is impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the System once it is installed.

Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but have ended up with even more problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child Support and Solicitors' Fees).

Having Wife 1.0 installed, I recommend you keep it Installed and deal with the difficulties as best as you can. When any faults or problems occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must run the C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE Program and avoid attempting to use the *Esc-Key for it will freeze the entire system.

It may be necessary to run C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE a number of times, and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal..

Wife 1.0, although a very high maintenance programme, can be very rewarding. To get the most out of it, consider buying additional Software such as "Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates 5.0" or "HUGS\ KISSES 600.0" or "TENDERNESS\ UNDERSTANDING 1000.0" or even Eating out without the Kids 7.2.1" (if Child processing has already started).

DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary 2.1" (Short Skirt Version) or "One Nightstand 3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported Application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost certainly CRASH.

BEST WISHES!

Yours, Systems Analyst.
###########################
Jesus..I was also having the same problem so here is my question, is it not posible to dual boot wife 1.0 and girlfriend 7.0 on my platform, as that i think i enjoy most of features in girlfriend 7.0...So that i can have both of them at the same time and choose at startup?

Confused....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

hi
i have just upgraded from boyfriend 1.7 to husband 2.2, it comes with everlasting love 1.2.1
everlasting love was running perfectly i can even create lunch out and dinner out documents
it also have features like roses twice a week1.2 , sex 1.5 ,shopping 1.0 , attention 1.4 , presents 1.7 visting inlaws 1.5 and travelling 2.1.1.

after some time a friend told me that its wise to also install child1.2 as it goes well with husband 2.2, so i installed child 1.1 and child 1.2, now the problem started after child 1.2.
child 1.2 just corrupted the whole system, now most of my program don't run anymore
now i have watching soccer with the boys 1.3, no help in the kitchen 1.6 , working overtime 2.4 that was trying to upgrade itself to working overtime 2.5 last time i started my system up. last night i discover that there was
a new program called honey i'm tied 1.2 and when i checked it, it has features like
i'm not eating dinner and no sex, not even a kiss.

i called my friend and she told me to check if i can find lover 1.0 on the system
i checked but only found unknown 1.2 and this does not prove anything.

so i'm writing to any system analyst, is there anyway i can find out what unknown 1.2 s name
and behavior before i throw away the whole system, or maybe is there anyway that i can resolve this issue?

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Re: Computer Geek Humor!!

#7

Post by balladeer » Wed Mar 09, 2011 11:24 am

This is computer geek humor is awesome.

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