Children's Books You'll Never See

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cslewislover
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Children's Books You'll Never See

#1

Post by cslewislover » Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:35 am

These are taken from an advertising flyer that gets placed in coffee shops and such. Feel free to make up and add your own. :D

"You Are Different and That's Bad"

"Pop! Goes the Hamster . . . And Other Great Microwave Games"

"Testing Homemade Parachutes Using Household Pets"

"Babar Meets the Taxidermist"

"The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables"

"Start a Real-Estate Empire with the Change from Your Mom's Purse"

"The Pop-UP Book of Human Anatomy"

"Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will"

"You Were An Accident"
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#2

Post by zoegirl » Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:19 pm

D'Oh!!

(there really is , by the way, a pop-up book on human anatomy but it does not have what is so implied in that title :ewink: )
"And we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Jesus Christ"

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#3

Post by Harry12345 » Thu Mar 19, 2009 10:25 am

children_1.gif
children_1.gif (85.05 KiB) Viewed 3930 times
If you're born once, you die twice; but if you're born twice, you die once.

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#4

Post by cslewislover » Thu Mar 19, 2009 10:34 am

:pound:

LOL, where'd you find that?
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#5

Post by Harry12345 » Thu Mar 19, 2009 10:36 am

cslewislover wrote::pound:

LOL, where'd you find that?
I can't even remember! Must have been google images. :P
If you're born once, you die twice; but if you're born twice, you die once.

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#6

Post by For_Narniaaa » Sun Jun 07, 2009 5:36 pm

Harry12345 wrote:
children_1.gif
:esurprised: You mean Santa's not real!?!?!?!
:clap:
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#7

Post by ageofknowledge » Mon Aug 10, 2009 4:13 pm

I had one of those friends that was really crazy when I was young and his thing was calling up adult book stores and asking if they could sell him a children's Bible. Fortunately they had invented speaker phones by then and I could listen in. Inevitably the discussion digressed with the porn shop worker repeating over and over "Sir, this is an ADULT book store" at which point this guy would say "Fine, I'll take an ADULT sized Bible then."

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#8

Post by warhoop » Sat Aug 15, 2009 1:28 pm

How about:

"Fun with Frogs and Firecrackers"

"Don't Take my Word for It, Touch the Stove"

"It's OK, He's Mexican"

"I Love Your Brother More Than You"

"Earning Your Keep: The Decline of the GDP with the Advent of Child Labor Laws (Illustrated)"

"The Cat in the Hat does Crack"

"That's a Horrible Drawing"

"The Benefits of Substance Abuse"

"If You Want It, You Should Take It"

"The Pop-Up Book of Reproduction"

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#9

Post by Harry12345 » Sun Aug 16, 2009 2:19 pm

warhoop wrote: "Earning Your Keep: The Decline of the GDP with the Advent of Child Labor Laws (Illustrated)"
This is my favourite so far. :pound:

"Curious George and the high-voltage fence"

"Barney: The Prison Years"

"The Care Bears maul a camper in the woods and are shot dead"

"Controlling the Playground: Respect through Fear"
If you're born once, you die twice; but if you're born twice, you die once.

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#10

Post by cslewislover » Sun Aug 16, 2009 3:13 pm

Harry12345 wrote: "Curious George and the high-voltage fence"
I might actually enjoy that one. :D
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#11

Post by Harry12345 » Mon Aug 17, 2009 12:10 am

cslewislover wrote:
Harry12345 wrote: "Curious George and the high-voltage fence"
I might actually enjoy that one. :D
You're an evil woman! :P
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#12

Post by Gabrielman » Mon Aug 24, 2009 10:09 pm

:pound: :pound: :pound: Just looking for some laughs... found them! :pound: :pound: :pound:
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#13

Post by For_Narniaaa » Sat Aug 29, 2009 6:12 pm

"Fun with Frogs and Firecrackers"
"The Cat in the Hat does Crack"
"The Care Bears maul a camper in the woods and are shot dead"
:lol:

"Smokey Bear: Let's Play With Fire"

"Peter Pan: The Boy Who Eventually Grew Up Just Like Everyone Else"

"The Barney Costume Unzipped"
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"The God of the universe---the Creator of nitrogen and pine needles, galaxies and E-minor---loves you with a radical, unconditional, self-sacrificing love." ~Francis Chan

Banner credit: arwen-undomiel.com

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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#14

Post by cslewislover » Sat Aug 29, 2009 6:31 pm

:D

Peter Rabbit and the Big Hot Stew

Red Neck City and the Case of the Missing Trailer

Pikachu's Maternity Leave Adventures
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Re: Children's Books You'll Never See

#15

Post by Borkuf » Sun Aug 30, 2009 8:55 pm

Warhoop reminded me of Maddox's piece on children's art.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=irule

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