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duck jokes

Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 2:20 pm
by andyredeemed
A duck walks into a drug store and asks for some lip-balm. "Yes sir", says the pharmacist." Will you be paying cash?"
"No" says the duck."Just put it on my bill".
Laugh? I nearly did!

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Microwave it till its bill withers!

Re: duck jokes

Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2007 2:41 pm
by zoegirl
andyredeemed wrote:A duck walks into a drug store and asks for some lip-balm. "Yes sir", says the pharmacist." Will you be paying cash?"
"No" says the duck."Just put it on my bill".
Laugh? I nearly did!

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Microwave it till its bill withers!
:lol:

Here's two I remember...


Why do ducks have webbed feet?

To stamp out forest fires....

Why do elephants have flat feet?

To stamp out burning ducks...

:shock:

Re: duck jokes

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2007 9:57 am
by FFC
A woman walks into a grocery store with a duck under her arm. A man asks what are you doing with that pig? The woman says it's not a pig it's a duck. The man says I was talking to the duck.

:shock:

Re: duck jokes

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2007 4:36 pm
by andyredeemed
A duck goes into a butchers shop and says "Have you got any string?"
"No, this is a butchers. We don't sell string." says the guy at the counter.
Half an hour later the duck returns and says: "Have you got any string?"
"I already told you. We don't sell string", says the guy.
A short while later the duck returns again. " Have you got any string?"
The guy looses his head and shouts "I TOLD YOU THIS IS A BUTCHERS SHOP. WE DON'T SELL STRING!!!!!IF YOU ASK ME THAT AGAIN, I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THE FLOOR!!!!"
The duck looks at him, then says "Have you got any nails?"
"NO WE DON'T HAVE ANY NAILS"
"Ok, " says the duck, "have you got any string?"

Re: duck jokes

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2007 4:56 pm
by zoegirl
andyredeemed wrote:A duck goes into a butchers shop and says "Have you got any string?"
"No, this is a butchers. We don't sell string." says the guy at the counter.
Half an hour later the duck returns and says: "Have you got any string?"
"I already told you. We don't sell string", says the guy.
A short while later the duck returns again. " Have you got any string?"
The guy looses his head and shouts "I TOLD YOU THIS IS A BUTCHERS SHOP. WE DON'T SELL STRING!!!!!IF YOU ASK ME THAT AGAIN, I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THE FLOOR!!!!"
The duck looks at him, then says "Have you got any nails?"
"NO WE DON'T HAVE ANY NAILS"
"Ok, " says the duck, "have you got any string?"
:lol: :lol:

smart little duck