This really bothers me...

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Callisto
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This really bothers me...

#1

Post by Callisto » Fri Jun 01, 2012 6:48 pm

I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset. I know what I believe and why I believe it, I know that God is real and I believe in Christ.... But I have a VERY hard time dealing with atheists and others (but mostly atheists) when they direct such immense hatred at me, use condescending words toward me, and such. They don't really dissuade me in my thinking, although they may plant seeds of doubt, but I think the fact I get upset makes it hard for me to keep pressing on. You can call me thin-skinned, it's true. (I attribute my short-temper to my father. ;) ) It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.

I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.

What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others? Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.

Sorry for the incoherent post.

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Re: This really bothers me...

#2

Post by B. W. » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:31 pm

Callisto wrote:I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset. I know what I believe and why I believe it, I know that God is real and I believe in Christ.... But I have a VERY hard time dealing with atheists and others (but mostly atheists) when they direct such immense hatred at me, use condescending words toward me, and such. They don't really dissuade me in my thinking, although they may plant seeds of doubt, but I think the fact I get upset makes it hard for me to keep pressing on. You can call me thin-skinned, it's true. (I attribute my short-temper to my father. ;) ) It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.

I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.

What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others? Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.

Sorry for the incoherent post.
Not an incoherent post at all...

Answer, know what you believe by knowing Jesus...

Acts 18:9 - And the Lord said to Paul in the night by a vision, "Do not be afraid any longer, but go on speaking and do not be silent NASB
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Re: This really bothers me...

#3

Post by narnia4 » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:36 pm

I struggle with negative feelings over certain aggressive types of unbelievers. It used to be the case that I bought into self-confidence, if someone said they knew something then I kind of took it for granted that they did know something. I was smart enough to not believe their rhetoric without presented evidence, but now I stop listening whenever I determine that a person is only "hating" and act in a condescending way. If a person is doing that, they aren't in a state of mind where arguments will do any good. Anything I could say would probably only make them angrier. And if that's all your getting from a conversation instead of any kind of real discourse, get out of the conversation. Its simply never been worth it, at least for me. If there's angry atheists on youtube comments, I just ignore it.

I think the above is an important point when it comes to taking care of yourself mentally and spiritually. If someone is subjecting you to foul talk about God and attacking you personally, "shake the dust off your feet" and move on. There's a time when people are approachable and a time when they most likely aren't.

That's a fairly easy point for me, a harder thing is to really act out in my mind what I know to be true as far as aggressive nonbelievers as a group. They're mostly people that are hurt or angry in some way, or maybe some of them think they're "cool". Whatever the case, they're the lost. God does have a love for them, they aren't worthless or anything like that.
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Re: This really bothers me...

#4

Post by Callisto » Fri Jun 01, 2012 8:17 pm

narnia4 wrote:I struggle with negative feelings over certain aggressive types of unbelievers. It used to be the case that I bought into self-confidence, if someone said they knew something then I kind of took it for granted that they did know something. I was smart enough to not believe their rhetoric without presented evidence, but now I stop listening whenever I determine that a person is only "hating" and act in a condescending way. If a person is doing that, they aren't in a state of mind where arguments will do any good. Anything I could say would probably only make them angrier. And if that's all your getting from a conversation instead of any kind of real discourse, get out of the conversation. Its simply never been worth it, at least for me. If there's angry atheists on youtube comments, I just ignore it.

I think the above is an important point when it comes to taking care of yourself mentally and spiritually. If someone is subjecting you to foul talk about God and attacking you personally, "shake the dust off your feet" and move on. There's a time when people are approachable and a time when they most likely aren't.

That's a fairly easy point for me, a harder thing is to really act out in my mind what I know to be true as far as aggressive nonbelievers as a group. They're mostly people that are hurt or angry in some way, or maybe some of them think they're "cool". Whatever the case, they're the lost. God does have a love for them, they aren't worthless or anything like that.
Sometimes it's not even conversations with them. Often I come across their rhetoric and vile comments on the Internet, in any given website. (I've seen it on Pinterest, of all places, and it never ends.) The only thing I could do is to stop using those sites, but of course that's kind of silly to just shut myself off because of a few haters. And it's not that I find their arguments compelling - I know ad hominem and straw man arguments when I see them - but just that they bother me and dig like a knife in my side, slowly inching in closer and closer until I get to the point where I have to cut everything off so I can get back in a better state of mind. This tends to help, but I know I'll never get away from it for long. I feel like a coward when I do that, though, or that maybe I'm in some way letting them down by not pushing harder to get them to see, but some part of me knows that nothing I can say will change their minds unless they change their hearts first....

My question was, "How do I cope with it?". I know that God will take care of things in the end, but in the meantime, how do I live with the endless bickering and hatred? I guess what I REALLY need is that peace that surpasses all understanding. I have not found it yet. I'm scared that I won't. :(

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Re: This really bothers me...

#5

Post by 1over137 » Fri Jun 01, 2012 10:20 pm

Callisto wrote: Sometimes it's not even conversations with them. Often I come across their rhetoric and vile comments on the Internet, in any given website. (I've seen it on Pinterest, of all places, and it never ends.) The only thing I could do is to stop using those sites, but of course that's kind of silly to just shut myself off because of a few haters. And it's not that I find their arguments compelling - I know ad hominem and straw man arguments when I see them - but just that they bother me and dig like a knife in my side, slowly inching in closer and closer until I get to the point where I have to cut everything off so I can get back in a better state of mind. This tends to help, but I know I'll never get away from it for long. I feel like a coward when I do that, though, or that maybe I'm in some way letting them down by not pushing harder to get them to see, but some part of me knows that nothing I can say will change their minds unless they change their hearts first....

My question was, "How do I cope with it?". I know that God will take care of things in the end, but in the meantime, how do I live with the endless bickering and hatred? I guess what I REALLY need is that peace that surpasses all understanding. I have not found it yet. I'm scared that I won't. :(
So, you want to keep talking to atheists on their forums and are asking how do you cope with things connected with it? I would go crazy if I was constantly speaking to them on their forums. I think that sometimes one must 'cut everything off' so that he finds 'the peace that surpasses all understanding'. And do not feel like a coward. Have some of them told you that you are? Tell them to come here and HONESTLY discuss things with us if they are not cowards.
But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good.
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For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.
-- Philippians 1:6

#foreverinmyheart

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Re: This really bothers me...

#6

Post by Bradigans » Sat Jun 02, 2012 8:59 am

I know ad hominem and straw man arguments when I see them - but just that they bother me and dig like a knife in my side, slowly inching in closer and closer until I get to the point where I have to cut everything off so I can get back in a better state of mind.
- Matthew 7:6 - Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.
I guess what I REALLY need is that peace that surpasses all understanding. I have not found it yet. I'm scared that I won't.
- Acts 14:22 - and that we must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God.

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Re: This really bothers me...

#7

Post by Reactionary » Sat Jun 02, 2012 12:23 pm

Callisto wrote:I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset.
Callisto wrote:Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.
As you said yourself, you're sensitive. For a person in your position it's not very recommended to bring yourself in situations that upset you. You can only do harm to yourself, for no reason, because you'll hardly succeed in proving a point. As a popular meme says, "Haters gonna hate". They don't want to know the truth. If they did, they wouldn't be using strawmen and ad hominems as you noticed, but would be open-minded, which despite boasting about it, they're not.
Callisto wrote:It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.
You're not weak, it's just that these days we're being overloaded with information from everywhere, and it's sometimes difficult for the brain to sort it out. I was just talking to Short1 about that the other day. We don't have the time to research everything there is about Christianity. Nor we should - we'd hardly have time to do anything else in our lives. I was on that path, then I said "stop", I'll proceed by faith as I already know more than most people do about Christianity. Ever since I've felt more peace than before.
Callisto wrote:I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.
I would attribute that to your anxiety. I used to have this fear from facing my doubts when I was emotionally sensitive due to a vitamin deficiency. Long story, but anyway, chemicals and hormones in our bodies can influence us in a way we can't even imagine. If I were you, I'd prioritize treating anxiety. But doing that involves primarily making peace with yourself. You'll harm your health if you keep living the way you do now. You're young, barely older than me, and there's still a lot of things that await us. Why fret over something we can't affect?
Callisto wrote:What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others?
Human ignorance combined with arrogance can infuriate me, but what can I do? There's no point in trying to correct all the wrongs in this world. Sometimes we just have to let go, and live our lives. Live as an example, be moral, guide and help your "neighbors" when they need it, nurture your relationship with God, and that's pretty much all you can do as an individual. "News" about Christianity being false don't affect me anymore, as I've recognized a pattern that they follow all the time. I just ignore them, and I recommend that you do the same. Focus on what you can affect, and you'll find your peace.
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Re: This really bothers me...

#8

Post by jlay » Sat Jun 02, 2012 2:19 pm

Callisto wrote:I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset. I know what I believe and why I believe it, I know that God is real and I believe in Christ.... But I have a VERY hard time dealing with atheists and others (but mostly atheists) when they direct such immense hatred at me, use condescending words toward me, and such. They don't really dissuade me in my thinking, although they may plant seeds of doubt, but I think the fact I get upset makes it hard for me to keep pressing on. You can call me thin-skinned, it's true. (I attribute my short-temper to my father. ;) ) It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.

I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.

What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others? Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.

Sorry for the incoherent post.
I can only assume since you are an introvert that these cases are occurring on internet forums. If this causes you grief, then you probably shouldn't seek out internet sights where Christian bashing is going on. If you care to elaborate on specific sites where this is occurring it may help us offer some advice. Facebook?
If you walk through bad neighborhoods, your bound to get in a fight.

This computer age, introvert, persecuted Christian seems to be a recurring theme. This is the only forum I participate in. I find people, particularly your age group are spending too much time on computer forums. It's unhealthy. People need real relationships face to face.
As far as Christian bashing, get used to it. The Bible says, James 1:2, Romans 5:3, just to name a few.
-“The Bible treated allegorically becomes putty in the hands of the exegete.” John Walvoord

"I'm not saying scientists don't overstate their results. They do. And it's understandable, too...If you spend years working toward a certain goal and make no progress, of course you are going to spin your results in a positive light." Ivellious

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Re: This really bothers me...

#9

Post by Callisto » Sat Jun 02, 2012 7:59 pm

Thanks for the replies everyone. Since it would take quite a while to individually reply to everyone, I'll just say a few things here:

1) Yes, many of these encounters are of the Internet type, since I'm an introvert and don't go to the nearest coffee shop waving my arms and asking people if they believe in God or not... I rather just get my coffee and go home or sit quietly. :)

2) Most of the time I am not actually debating anyone but rather reading debates between other people entirely - and the anger occurs when the atheist (or non-Christian) is attacking, viciously, a Christian brother or sister. I want to defend them, even if they don't need defending.... Or, I'll be surfing Facebook, a news website, or even humor websites and I'll see a comment or article that bothers me. Usually I do the right thing - simply ignore it and not give it the honor of occupying my time. I'll still think about it a bit later though. I go to forums like this one to get some positive "vibes", but I feel like I'm engaging in cognitive dissonance.

3) I don't think any atheist has called me a coward. I have called myself a coward, or at least inwardly "said" it by how I feel. This was what I was talking about when I said I feel like I'm battling myself. It's because I really am. The main reason I don't go on a lot of websites featuring atheists throwing firebombs is because I don't want to raise my blood pressure any more, or get frustrated. This includes Christian websites that have atheist trolls lurking everywhere. I know when they are trolling and flamethrowing, and I know what they say is rubbish, but yet I still get agitated.

4) I know that Christ is the key in all things. I have faith. But I need to get closer to him. Clearly something isn't working. Maybe I need to study Scripture more, pray more, or try to do more things of service to others.... I think I need to be more trusting of him, to just let God do things and stop trying to put the world on my shoulders because it's breaking my back. So, what do you guys do to get closer and be more trusting?

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Re: This really bothers me...

#10

Post by RickD » Sat Jun 02, 2012 8:06 pm

Maybe I need to study Scripture more, pray more, or try to do more things of service to others.... I think I need to be more trusting of him, to just let God do things and stop trying to put the world on my shoulders because it's breaking my back. So, what do you guys do to get closer and be more trusting?
I think you answered your own question. :D
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Re: This really bothers me...

#11

Post by Callisto » Sat Jun 02, 2012 8:30 pm

RickD wrote:
Maybe I need to study Scripture more, pray more, or try to do more things of service to others.... I think I need to be more trusting of him, to just let God do things and stop trying to put the world on my shoulders because it's breaking my back. So, what do you guys do to get closer and be more trusting?
I think you answered your own question. :D
Hm, indeed I did. Or... did I? y*-:)

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Re: This really bothers me...

#12

Post by B. W. » Sat Jun 02, 2012 9:16 pm

Callisto wrote:... Maybe I need to study Scripture more, pray more, or try to do more things of service to others.... I think I need to be more trusting of him, to just let God do things and stop trying to put the world on my shoulders because it's breaking my back.

...So, what do you guys do to get closer and be more trusting?

Answer, know what you believe by knowing Jesus...

There is no pat answer for how to get to know someone. To get to know anyone really well goes beyond knowing someone on an intellectual level. Many believers, including myself started by knowing Jesus on an intellectual level and this became unsatisfying.

I was lead to these bible verses

Luke 11:9, 1, 11, 12, 13, "So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish? Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!" NKJV

Luke 11:5, 6, 7, 8 speaks of persistence and verse 9 picks up on this. The key is keep on asking – seeking, knock… that you want to get to know him more and better each day.

For me, then, I read this passage:

Psalms 46:10-11, "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! 11 The LORD of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah" NKJV

I did not realize it at the time - but he was speaking thru the bible to answering my request...

I had to be still and learn something else: Matthew 11:28, 29, 30

Be still and rest in him – so I began asking the Lord for this rest and to let me know he is there, to know his presence. He has honored this ever since in very unique and personally astounding ways.

It all began by asking, seeking, and knocking – realizing his grace is new everymorning…
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Re: This really bothers me...

#13

Post by Bradigans » Sun Jun 03, 2012 6:58 am

jlay wrote:
Callisto wrote:I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset. I know what I believe and why I believe it, I know that God is real and I believe in Christ.... But I have a VERY hard time dealing with atheists and others (but mostly atheists) when they direct such immense hatred at me, use condescending words toward me, and such. They don't really dissuade me in my thinking, although they may plant seeds of doubt, but I think the fact I get upset makes it hard for me to keep pressing on. You can call me thin-skinned, it's true. (I attribute my short-temper to my father. ;) ) It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.

I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.

What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others? Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.

Sorry for the incoherent post.
As far as Christian bashing, get used to it. The Bible says, James 1:2, Romans 5:3, just to name a few.
Amen...

- John 15:18 - If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you.

- 1 John 3:13 - Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you.

IN CHRIST

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Re: This really bothers me...

#14

Post by Callisto » Sun Jun 03, 2012 9:44 am

Bradigans wrote:
jlay wrote:
Callisto wrote:I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset. I know what I believe and why I believe it, I know that God is real and I believe in Christ.... But I have a VERY hard time dealing with atheists and others (but mostly atheists) when they direct such immense hatred at me, use condescending words toward me, and such. They don't really dissuade me in my thinking, although they may plant seeds of doubt, but I think the fact I get upset makes it hard for me to keep pressing on. You can call me thin-skinned, it's true. (I attribute my short-temper to my father. ;) ) It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.

I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.

What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others? Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.

Sorry for the incoherent post.
As far as Christian bashing, get used to it. The Bible says, James 1:2, Romans 5:3, just to name a few.
Amen...

- John 15:18 - If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you.

- 1 John 3:13 - Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you.

IN CHRIST
Yes, I know why it happens and that it will continue to. I'm not surprised at that. And when I'm feeling crappy, I just remind myself about the commitment and bravery of the Christians in other places of the world where even owning up to being a Christian can be a death sentence. Right now I don't face that. My fight is on a different level. Those verses often go through my head when I see hateful attacks on others (or myself). Maybe I should put it all in perspective and wear it like a badge of honor - it's not me they are attacking, it's Christ, God Himself whom they are attacking. I just feel sad that people who exert such hatred may not know what they are doing.

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Re: This really bothers me...

#15

Post by Mitzy » Wed Jun 06, 2012 12:31 pm

Callisto wrote:I'm a somewhat sensitive person, meaning that it doesn't take much for me to get angry, stigmatized, or in other ways upset. I know what I believe and why I believe it, I know that God is real and I believe in Christ.... But I have a VERY hard time dealing with atheists and others (but mostly atheists) when they direct such immense hatred at me, use condescending words toward me, and such. They don't really dissuade me in my thinking, although they may plant seeds of doubt, but I think the fact I get upset makes it hard for me to keep pressing on. You can call me thin-skinned, it's true. (I attribute my short-temper to my father. ;) ) It bothers me that I get upset because I feel like a weakling and that I have a pitiful level of faith that I let it bother me, and yet I cannot stop it.

I feel like I'm battling myself.... This must be what they call the spiritual warfare we experience. There's no other way to describe it other than I'm constantly being "stabbed" over and over again with their "knives". Part of me almost doesn't fear death in the fact that they will all finally shut up, but I suppose it's not the right way to think of it. Some days are worse than others. (NO, I am NOT suicidal, I do not want to imply this.) I'm just tired, and I'm only in my 20's.

What I want to know is, how do you all handle this when you are in debates with them, read things on the Internet or see things on the news that really make you mad (or sad)? Basically - how do you put up with other people when all you feel is walls being built up against you to shield you from others? Keep in mind I already have social anxiety, am introverted, and have a low trust of others the way it is.

Sorry for the incoherent post.
I have some of the same issues. I use debating with those kinds of people to help me control my temper and be able to respond to them without insults and getting all emotional. I have been debating a lot and I understand what you mean. You get attacked just because you are Christian and have a different opinion than the liberals. Athiests are the worst they try and make Christians who believe in creation seem illogical and just plain stupid. When in reality they are the ones that lack logic. Logicly evolution is ridiculous. I fight back by not posting scripture because they believe it is just a book written by man, but by posting scientific facts that debunk their beliefs. It doesn't matter what you say anyway because they refuse to believe in a God especially the Bible God. They will ignore facts and reason but I like to put just a little bit of doubts in their minds about their beliefs.

If talking to them at all really upsets you then I sugest you quit or do it in moderation. You have to be tough skinned to talk to those people because you will be attacked. We are the close minded ones but in reality they attacked for believing differently.

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