BDSM in the marriage bed

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#76

Post by Philip » Wed Jan 24, 2018 5:11 pm

Kid, as an unmarried young guy and a Christian, ought you to be terribly concerned with BDSM?

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#77

Post by Kurieuo » Wed Jan 24, 2018 6:45 pm

thatkidakayoungguy wrote:
Kurieuo wrote:If such makes you happy though, then how can it be wrong? :twisted:
We can apply that to ANY sin.
Don't usually we sin bc it feels good?
Just playing devil's advocate.
"Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved." (Romans 10:13)

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#78

Post by thatkidakayoungguy » Thu Jan 25, 2018 8:13 am

Philip wrote:Kid, as an unmarried young guy and a Christian, ought you to be terribly concerned with BDSM?
Yea, hence why I started this thread. I wasn't sure about if mild BDSM was sin or not.
Now I know it is.

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#79

Post by Nessa » Thu Jan 25, 2018 12:20 pm

What?! Now you know its a sin cos a bunch of strangers post their thoughts and the majority might say its wrong?

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#80

Post by RickD » Thu Jan 25, 2018 12:35 pm

Nessa wrote:What?! Now you know its a sin cos a bunch of strangers post their thoughts and the majority might say its wrong?
I think it's because you said it isn't necessarily wrong, and he just went with the opposite of what you said. That's usually a safe choice. :mrgreen:
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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#81

Post by Hortator » Thu Jan 25, 2018 12:47 pm

This reminds me of our 50 shades of grey thread

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#82

Post by thatkidakayoungguy » Thu Jan 25, 2018 3:45 pm

Hortator wrote:This reminds me of our 50 shades of grey thread
Yea, I saw that one too. Some of it anyhow.

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#83

Post by thatkidakayoungguy » Thu Jan 25, 2018 6:15 pm

Ed gave me this link, http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbds ... anbdsm.htm
Now I'm getting confused.

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#84

Post by Philip » Thu Jan 25, 2018 6:49 pm

That website blurs some important lines. So, are we talking about temporary role playing fantasies (not involving other people), but of loving submission? Is that submission EXPECTED? Is it temporary for various sessions, or is that the way the relationship always works? And if a couple's sexual relationship always revolves around this scenario, how does that play out in other areas of it? Is the submissive one in bed ALWAYS submissive outside of bed? I also didn't see the question put forth of whether this practice involves inflicting pain - whether physical or mental, as part of the arrangement. I'm not speaking of light pinching, tickling or faux spanking, but of actually and intentionally inflicting pain upon one's spouse. So, these are questions. Inflicting pain or always expecting submission, whether in bed or out, makes for a one-sided, dependent and unhealthy relationship and expectations. And a whole lot of times, it's one particular spouse that is by far more enthusiastic about this setup - usually the man. And there are HUGE differences between swapping back and forth as to who takes control in various bedroom episodes, and one that is permanently built around this. A lot of times, the so-called submission is forced on (and not truly desired by) the other spouse - who just goes along with it (far more common that the woman is the submissive one).

Also, I noticed that website trying to differentiate between BDSM from a Christian practice of it, as compared to people unfettered by spiritual constraints. The reality is, people can convince themselves of all manner of stuff is okay. The website Q & A tried to make a parallel that being submissive (by the woman?) supports traditional Biblical ideas about marriage - a totally false statement! It trots out the idea of the dominant being always cognizant of the feelings and impacts on the submissive, as if that is similar to Christ's love for the church. What a sad perspective!
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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#85

Post by thatkidakayoungguy » Thu Jan 25, 2018 7:22 pm

Philip wrote:I'm not speaking of light pinching, tickling or faux spanking,
Oh that's good...

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#86

Post by Kurieuo » Thu Jan 25, 2018 7:28 pm

Nessa wrote:What?! Now you know its a sin cos a bunch of strangers post their thoughts and the majority might say its wrong?
Scripture can be taken as being much more damning of us, saying even our good works are like filthy rags (a blood-stained menstrual rag) to God. (Isaiah 64:6)
"Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved." (Romans 10:13)

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#87

Post by thatkidakayoungguy » Fri Jan 26, 2018 1:59 pm

Nessa wrote:What?! Now you know its a sin cos a bunch of strangers post their thoughts and the majority might say its wrong?
No, because what they said was convincing. Including where Philip said faux spanking isn't a sin. Helps hehe.

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#88

Post by Philip » Fri Jan 26, 2018 6:19 pm

"Light" = playful. Course, I'm not the expert on this - I never even read THAT book.

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#89

Post by Kurieuo » Fri Jan 26, 2018 6:36 pm

Sorry, accidentally deleted Nessa's post y#-o but quoted below:
Nessa wrote:Even magicians can be convincing :roll:

We are after truth...
Truth is often prickly.
"Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved." (Romans 10:13)

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Re: BDSM in the marriage bed

#90

Post by Nessa » Fri Jan 26, 2018 7:03 pm

Kurieuo wrote:Sorry, accidentally deleted Nessa's post y#-o but quoted below:
Nessa wrote:Even magicians can be convincing :roll:

We are after truth...
Truth is often prickly.
Oh, so now your the convincing magician making my post 'disappear' y/:] :P

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