Sexual relations between wife and husband

Discussion for Christian perspectives on ethical issues such as abortion, euthanasia, sexuality, and so forth.
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Danieltwotwenty
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Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by Danieltwotwenty »

Hi Guys

I am pretty sure that what I am about to ask is within the guidelines of the board, if I am wrong I apologise.
Anyway there seems to be some confusion from myself and other Christians about what is acceptable between a husband and wife during sexual intercourse.
Is oral sex considered sexual sin, I looked on the site and couldn't find any reference to it and did some google searches and got arguments for both yes and no.
This was actually a subject my wife bought up as she is agnostic and doesn't have a problem with it but since I became a Christian I have abstained as I was not sure if it is allowed or not.

Dan
1Tim1:15-17
Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever.Amen.
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by Reactionary »

Only recently I came across an article by CARM that seems to deal with the issue:
http://carm.org/oral-sex
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neo-x
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by neo-x »

Dan, whats the confusion y:-/ No one can tell you "Through Scriptures" as in the sense that God allows for this or not. At best it will be a man's opinion. If you love each other, it is fine whether you abstain from this or not.
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by Ivellious »

There have been some Christian groups (and other religious groups as well) that have condemned oral and anal sex by filing them under the title of sodomy. To my knowledge, they were at one point solely associated with homosexual sex, which is why certain religious factions pushed to make them illegal in the first place (to try to cut down on homosexuality...of course, it's kind of hard to enforce). I know that the state I live in actually did have a law against oral sex until it was repealed very recently.

Based on the Bible, some Christian groups interpreted various themes against homosexuality and some more extreme groups have condemned it, though as the link above points out, there isn't a clear "yes" or "no," but I would interpret the parts about married couples being allowed and encouraged to "enjoy" each other's company (so to speak) to allow it.
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Rob
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by Rob »

I don't think there's a problem with it. If oral sex is a sin, then is touching each other in the nether regions a sin too? Where do we draw the line?
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B. W.
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by B. W. »

Please read the Song of Solomon as that covers this issue very well.

Next, a husband must love and respect their wife and a wife must respect and love her husband. The bible teaches this. In the case of the marriage bed, neither side may force their spouse to perform sexually if they do not agree to the act. When you force – bitterness and cheapness creeps into the relationship, robbing the love and respect from each other. That is where you draw that line one does not cross.
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B. W.
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by B. W. »

B. W. wrote:Please read the Song of Solomon as that covers this issue very well.

Next, a husband must love and respect their wife and a wife must respect and love her husband. The bible teaches this. In the case of the marriage bed, neither side may force their spouse to perform sexually if they do not agree to the act. When you force – bitterness and cheapness creeps into the relationship, robbing the love and respect from each other. That is where you draw that line one does not cross. Ture heartfelt love will not cross that line at all cost.
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Science is man's invention - creation is God's
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Old Polish Proverb:
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Danieltwotwenty
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by Danieltwotwenty »

Interesting thanks guys, I think I will need to spend some time in prayer over this one.

Dan
1Tim1:15-17
Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever.Amen.
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by CeT-To »

Here you go: http://www.the-intimate-couple.com/is-o ... -okay.html

I love how sometimes searching things up randomly on google gives you good answers :P

Yeah it's fine in God's eyes, brother.
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by CallMeDave »

Hi Dan, I appreciate your concern with this sensitive issue.

First, here is a short treatise i found on the topic of anal intercourse... then ill respond below that to your other concerns :
_______________________________________________
Anal-genital

Human physiology makes it clear that the body was not designed to accommodate this activity. The rectum is significantly different from the vagina with regard to suitability for penetration by a penis. The vagina has natural lubricants and is supported by a network of muscles. It is composed of a mucus membrane with a multi-layer stratified squamous epithelium that allows it to endure friction without damage and to resist the immunological actions caused by semen and sperm. In comparison, the anus is a delicate mechanism of small muscles that comprise an "exit-only" passage. With repeated trauma, friction and stretching, the sphincter loses its tone and its ability to maintain a tight seal. Consequently, anal intercourse leads to leakage of fecal material that can easily become chronic.

The potential for injury is exacerbated by the fact that the intestine has only a single layer of cells separating it from highly vascular tissue, that is, blood. Therefore, any organisms that are introduced into the rectum have a much easier time establishing a foothold for infection than they would in a vagina. The single layer tissue cannot withstand the friction associated with penile penetration, resulting in traumas that expose both participants to blood, organisms in feces, and a mixing of bodily fluids.

Furthermore, ejaculate has components that are immunosuppressive. In the course of ordinary reproductive physiology, this allows the sperm to evade the immune defenses of the female. Rectal insemination of rabbits has shown that sperm impaired the immune defenses of the recipient.23 Semen may have a similar impact on humans.
.
______________________________________________

Based on the above , I would stay away from anal penetration and its pretty obvious that God would find this type of sex act wrong and dangerous, and thus perverted. As for Oral sex (Fallatio and Cunningless) , I have read a study which shows there are no health concerns between two Spouses who have cleaned up well beforehand (assuming no pre-existing diseases) ... and this includes ingesting the bodily fluids. I believe God would endorse this type of sex act between Spouses as part of the exploration process to see what brings good pleasure to both Parties and which in turn, cements the maritial relationship even more. Same for physical touching of genitilia . Further, love making need not be limited to just the bedroom so long as total privacy is gauranteed . I say all of this with the one caveat that : It is important never to ask your Spouse to do anything which he/she doesnt wish to do ; there are enough creative ways to make love without having the conscience of either Spouse seared . Hope this helps. Bon appetite ! (sorry...i couldnt help but say that) .
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Danieltwotwenty
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Re: Sexual relations between wife and husband

Post by Danieltwotwenty »

Thanks Dave

I think this issue is a lot clearer now, It is a hard thing to talk about and I even considered talking to our pastor but I couldn't fight the embarrassment.
Bon appetite ! (sorry...i couldnt help but say that) .
:pound: It's ok I have a sense of humor. :ebiggrin:


Dan
1Tim1:15-17
Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever.Amen.
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