Atheists: Is love a choice?

Healthy skepticism of ALL worldviews is good. Skeptical of non-belief like found in Atheism? Post your challenging questions. Responses are encouraged.
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Nessa
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Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Thu Mar 17, 2016 4:02 pm

What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

Kenny
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Kenny » Thu Mar 17, 2016 8:18 pm

Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken

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Nessa
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Thu Mar 17, 2016 8:43 pm

Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

Kenny
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Kenny » Thu Mar 17, 2016 9:05 pm

Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken

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Nessa
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Thu Mar 17, 2016 9:09 pm

Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?

Kenny
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Kenny » Fri Mar 18, 2016 5:43 am

Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?

That's one thing I like about you Nessa; you ask questions that make me have to think. I'm going to rephrase what I said earlier; I can feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone and still HAVE love for them at the same time.
To have love vs feeling love is different; just because I have love for someone doesn't mean I will always feel it 100% of the time I am with that person. By the same token; I could hate a person while not feeling that hatred I have for that person all the time either.

Ken

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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Audie » Fri Mar 18, 2016 5:55 am

Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?


Why would you think that has anything to do with whether one is an atheist?

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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Audie » Fri Mar 18, 2016 5:57 am

Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?

I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?



When I was married, whatever I felt for him went out like a candle when I discovered he'd been cheating on me. Zero, gone.

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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Fri Mar 18, 2016 7:35 am

Audie wrote:
Nessa wrote:What do you consider love is?
Just some chemical reactions goin' on?
Can you truly love someone if you feel no love?

How do you define love?


Why would you think that has anything to do with whether one is an atheist?


No, it's more a matter of just be interested how atheists view love :)

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Nessa
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Fri Mar 18, 2016 7:37 am

Audie wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?



When I was married, whatever I felt for him went out like a candle when I discovered he'd been cheating on me. Zero, gone.


Sorry to hear that happened, Audie :(
It must have been very painful.

Do you feel you could love someone without feeling something?

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Nessa
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Fri Mar 18, 2016 7:40 am

Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:I define love as an emotional feeling.

Ken


So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?

That's one thing I like about you Nessa; you ask questions that make me have to think. I'm going to rephrase what I said earlier; I can feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone and still HAVE love for them at the same time.
To have love vs feeling love is different; just because I have love for someone doesn't mean I will always feel it 100% of the time I am with that person. By the same token; I could hate a person while not feeling that hatred I have for that person all the time either.

Ken


So you believe love is ultimately a choice more than defining it as an emotional feeling? As you said you could still have love yet not necessarily feel it?

Audie
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Audie » Fri Mar 18, 2016 8:31 am

Nessa wrote:
Audie wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?



When I was married, whatever I felt for him went out like a candle when I discovered he'd been cheating on me. Zero, gone.


Sorry to hear that happened, Audie :(
It must have been very painful.

Do you feel you could love someone without feeling something?


Im not wanting any sympathy, but thanks. I just said it as an example of how love
can end rather abruptly.


Love without feeling?
Love is a feeling, so that is quite contradictory.

Asian and Western ideas about love are quite different,
probably more so that for two Westerners, one of whom is
religious, the other not.

Kenny
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Kenny » Fri Mar 18, 2016 12:01 pm

Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
So if you dont feel love for someone, does it mean you dont love them?

I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?

That's one thing I like about you Nessa; you ask questions that make me have to think. I'm going to rephrase what I said earlier; I can feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone and still HAVE love for them at the same time.
To have love vs feeling love is different; just because I have love for someone doesn't mean I will always feel it 100% of the time I am with that person. By the same token; I could hate a person while not feeling that hatred I have for that person all the time either.

Ken


So you believe love is ultimately a choice more than defining it as an emotional feeling? As you said you could still have love yet not necessarily feel it?

I would say love is several things; it is an emotion you can feel, but it is also something you can have. To have love for a person is probably more of a choice, but to feel love is usually more of a gradual thing; most can't turn this type of love on or off like a switch unless something dramatic or traumatic happen that causes them to do that.

Ken

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Nessa
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:23 pm

Audie wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Audie wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?



When I was married, whatever I felt for him went out like a candle when I discovered he'd been cheating on me. Zero, gone.


Sorry to hear that happened, Audie :(
It must have been very painful.

Do you feel you could love someone without feeling something?


Im not wanting any sympathy, but thanks. I just said it as an example of how love
can end rather abruptly.


Love without feeling?
Love is a feeling, so that is quite contradictory.

Asian and Western ideas about love are quite different,
probably more so that for two Westerners, one of whom is
religious, the other not.


So do you dont feel love is a choice? But maybe you can choose to carry out loving actions etc?

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Nessa
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Re: Atheists: Is love a choice?

Postby Nessa » Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:26 pm

Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:
Nessa wrote:
Kenny wrote:I don't know what it's like to feel no love for a person I love. I could feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone yet still feel love for them at the same time.

Ken


But say you suddenly felt no love for someone you now love. Would you still feel like you could say 'I love you' or do you need the feeling of love to be present to be able to say it and mean it?

That's one thing I like about you Nessa; you ask questions that make me have to think. I'm going to rephrase what I said earlier; I can feel anger, rage, and hostility towards someone and still HAVE love for them at the same time.
To have love vs feeling love is different; just because I have love for someone doesn't mean I will always feel it 100% of the time I am with that person. By the same token; I could hate a person while not feeling that hatred I have for that person all the time either.

Ken


So you believe love is ultimately a choice more than defining it as an emotional feeling? As you said you could still have love yet not necessarily feel it?

I would say love is several things; it is an emotion you can feel, but it is also something you can have. To have love for a person is probably more of a choice, but to feel love is usually more of a gradual thing; most can't turn this type of love on or off like a switch unless something dramatic or traumatic happen that causes them to do that.

Ken


I would agree with the above.
I think feelings of love can be gradual. Not sure if I believe in 'love at first sight'
Being a Christian, I guess I believe God can also cause you to feel something for someone and also stop you from feeling feelings (e.g if inappropriate)


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