Blessed wrote:...Wow. This is great stuff. Hard to hear. But the truth. What a wonderful revelation about sin nature in the heart.
Was this reveled to you little by little from life experience, theology, philosophizing, and learning over time etc., or was this impressed or explained to you during your NDE?
I wish there was a way to permanently get rid of these unwelcome inclinations and irrational thoughts of the heart. I have good days and bad days.
I have frequent internal,quarrels with God about the "good" I've done "proving" my consideration into heaven like some kind of criminal defense attorney in a high profile court case. After i sin, I have the audacity to blame God for "making me". Like watching porno. Afterwards it's all . "This is all your fault God i keep in shape make good money and you won't even send me a wife?". And "You made me do it". Then I throw Genesis at him "God you said it's not good for the man to be alone" "you created a wife suitable for Adam" "you gave me this desire" " why was i born in a feminism era" "you send me sluts" "not fair" "you made me do it" . Like some out of control smart mouth teenage brat.
On and on and on like you would not believe.
Of course Higher reasoning takes over i realize its A) Futile B) Wrong and C) Very sinful. Then I feel bad and scared of going to hell. God wants me to fight it and learn something. Instead I get convinced if X Y and Z were solved the cause of the sin would go away. I ask,forgiveness and God helps maintain and everything is perfect again.. then eventually sin just comes back... and the cycle repeats itself. Same for some of that other stuff you mentioned. It sucks. I want it gone permanently. The wages of sin is death. I pray not to go to hell but if sent i hope to be comforted knowing that my being there is saving others in heaven from being telepathically exposed to sin. Like someone with a virus who is permanently quarantined.
Holy Thread Resurrection Batman!
Yes, this came to me as I was judged back then, after death, standing before the Lord because all these things were exposed such as how I justified Betrayal, rejection, abandonment, neglect, scheming, put on trial to convict, false witness, mocking, scoffing, abuse, putting on people heavy burdens they cannot bear, crucifying those we do not like, etc and etc
It is something I cannot forget. I still affects me to this day. I see the world a bit different too because of it and see the wounds in our human hearts which keep us doing these things.
Jesus said in Luke 4:16,17,18,19 when he was quoting Isaiah 61:1,2,3,4 about good news and healing the broken/shattered hearts,setting folks free from what oppresses, etc... is the active part of the gospel message: The savior, Jesus Christ came to forgive, heal, and deliver us from our shame...
If you like to know more on this, then let me know and I will share a bit on this for you...