Life problems, personal problems, and social concerns.

[FlawedIntellect]

Um, hello. I'd like to request that other people pray for me, as there are some things I very much struggle with. There are also some things going on in life that are pretty rough, and I'm also worrying about friends who struggle with some similar problems that I do.

As per things going on in life, well, my mom is going through a rough divorce with a verbally abusive and manipulative husband/father, and since he abandoned us here by fleeing the state, and seeks to worm his way out of paying to support us over here for the time being, and seeking to manipulate us and take custody over my youngest sister, well, it's pretty chaotic. (Not going to really bring up some of the specific details of what's going on, but this captures the gist of things so far.) Things are pleasant overall day by day, at least for me, despite the things going on. Well, mom hasn't been able to make house payments so she has tried to focus on groceries, electricity, plumbing, and internet connection. Mom had a job for some time, though she lost her job some time ago and she's out job-hunting while also relying on some help from people giving us some money and help from places that give food to those in need. We've been able to get by so far, but well, Mom's trying to get a job, and we also need a new car due to being stuck with an old car that needs a lot of restoring done and lacks air conditioning. Additionally, my younger sister (not youngest) is getting trying to get into college and there are some needs for that to be tended to. Also, we may be needing a place to move to soon, so we're hoping for that as well. Mom is still dealing with depression, but she's been making progress.

Please pray for us so that God may help us with our circumstances (and it's pretty clear He has been helping us get by as time passes, and we're thankful for that), for my Mom to have a decent job, us to have a place to live and an additional vehicle, positive resolution of the custody battle, and for His help in steering our futures.



s per my personal problems, well, I unfortunately have some addiction problems that bring me into a battle with myself and tend to leave me a bit frantic with the dilemma of struggling with these addictions. The addictions are not drugs or alcohol. (Those scare me too much.) Rather, they come from the internet and have similar effects in maintaining an addiction.

I have an addiction to internet digital pornography of the anime "art" variety, in terms of various genres.
While I have been able to put up a blocker that helps filter and restrict a lot of these sites, i still have problems. I also have problems with lust, perversions, and masturbation. Add on top of that anti-social tendencies and social anxieties and worrying over my future, over breaking the addictions, and over resolving my personal conflict.

I also am very hot-tempered, stubborn, and I have trouble humbling myself. I often find my mouth speaking out violently in hatred, and when I stop to think I'm rather frightened by the words that come from my mouth.

This is very problematic behavior and calls into question my claim of being an alleged "Christian". I'm very stubborn on my beliefs and I strongly want to change, though in the process of condemning the choices of others I simultaneously condemn myself for the same thing, as to avoid judging hypocritically, and well, yeah...

I'm well aware that deeds aren't the cause of salvation, but rather a reflection of it, and I find myself a very poor reflection of Christ. This is the reason I ask for a prayer for my personal problems.

Please pray for me in that I'd be able to have a more calm and relaxed and humble attitude, and that as time passes that through Him the addictions and thoughts will halt and that I can shift my focus to Him instead.


On a final note, with social concerns, I have some online friends I worry about.

I have an atheist friend in Canada, and I really worry for her very much because she's had a past history of certain online interactions relevant to perversion (and I've had a similar past, though in a different way and probably with different outcomes.). If anything, she now believes herself to be a mere hopeless ****, having been called such by her Yugoslavian (Allegedly, self-proclaimed)Muslim ex-boyfriend with whom she's been in an on-again-off-again relationship for I-don't-and-probably-shouldn't-know how long. Also, she'd rather I just "let her burn in hell" and stop with all the "God crap" because apparently it ticks her off. She's had a history of exposure to pornography at a young age, and she refuses to admit it as wrong. If anything, though, this really worries me, and it's one of the reasons I've kept my distance recently. The other reason was her opposition to even bothering to listen to anything I have to say, insisting that it is me trying to "force it down her throat" when my effort has, instead, been to try to rationally persuade her otherwise with a bit of what I've learned, though that effort hasn't worked out too well... She once made emotional claims to have had a past of having been abused by alleged "Christians", once having spoken of having scars to prove it (and that she'd have to "pretend to be one" for them to leave her alone), though when addressed on the matter much later in a vocal chat, she dismissed it as being mental scars that weren't that bad.

I'd like to ask that you pray for her in that she may, over time, open her heart and recognize that considering how depressing she feels right now and how I'm worried for the direction her life may head, that she'd be more open to receiving help and influence to God as time moves on.



I'm sorry for this huge block of text, and not having posted it sooner, though now I've decided to step out of my shell and bring up this personal account of things that are on my heart, and that do worry me.

I know I shouldn't worry, though that hasn't stopped me, unfortunately. Thank-you for taking the time to read through this, and please pray for us here with the circumstances of life here with my family, my personal problems, as well as concerns for my friends.

I've probably revealed a little too much here, though then again, probably not.

Anyway, this is what I feel the need of something to be prayed for, which is why I ask this.

The new guy,

~Peter M.

[1over137]

May God bring peace into your heart as well as other hearts.

[PaulSacramento]

I pray that Our Lord strengthens you and your family, that His Love and Grace helps you through these difficult times and opens your eyes and heart to His Love.
When dealing with atheists, always remember to deal with love and to not judge them, but lead them to God with compassion and tenderness and understanding.
Always treat others as you would have them treat you and those you love.

[koopa184]

I will pray for your strengthening in this, Flawed. Just remember, you're not alone. I'm 100% sure there are people who understand, and I'm also 100% sure that God will be able to help you out.

[tdybas2]

deleted on user's request

[cheezerrox]

I commend you for your openness and honesty. You most definitely have my prayers and my friendship, brother. The strength of your faith and the honesty of your heart are extremely impressive, as people with the amount of hardships you're facing right now often become callous or unable to keep their hearts faithful to Christ, which you have done, even though you may stumble in deed at times. Keep in mind that we all stumble, and that as you continue in prayer and perserverance in trying to do G-d's will, He'll give you the strength, understanding, willpower, and peace that you need. Keep reading the Scriptures, and pray always, without ceasing. And remember to not try and rely on your own strength or power to overcome your sinful habits, but to rely solely on CHRIST. If you try to rely on your own strength, it'll only end up with frustration and discouragement. Christ is our strength; don't ask strength from Him, ask Him to BE your strength. When you stop relying on your own efforts, but relying on giving the struggle to G-d, you allow Him to work through you instead of you trying to work along with G-d. I say this because it is something ALL of us believers have done and continue to do, even when we know better.

Your friend has my prayers as well. Even though it's a big responsibility, keep in mind that YOU are representing who a real Christian is to your friend. As it was said earlier by PaulSacramento, remember that compassion, gentleness, understanding, and kindness are what needed to be shown to those with hard hearts. Be true to what you know is true, and to what you know is G-d's will when you speak with her. Be honest, be a friend, don't be judgemental, and most of all, again, show LOVE. It's the only way she'll see the truth in what you're trying to teach her.

I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to share this with us here, and know that you have all of our love here. You'll have the peace of the Spirit if you continue the way you are. You can conquer you're current struggles, because "G-d always leads us in triumph in Christ" (2 Corinthians 2:14).

2 Corinthians 4:8-10

[FlawedIntellect]

Sorry for a rather late update on providing an update, but well, it's time to say how things have been going.

Mom now has a job and has had one for several weeks, and while it doesn't quite pay much, she's still working to do what she can. One of my sisters is heading off to college, though it'll be a while before her books come in. Dad's still trying to win custody of my youngest sister, unfortunately, even though now it's more than clear that she wants nothing to do with dad, so yeah... And he still hasn't been paying child support money. The sister that is heading off to college has a car with air conditioning, which is great, and it's in good enough condition for her to go commuting. She also has a job.

Mom has made some friends over the internet and has been talking with them, and though from time to time she still tends to have moments where memories and worries hit her hard and bring her to tears, she's been getting better and it hasn't been happening as much as it used to. She enjoys her job because of nice coworkers, though still worries about money and how to support us with what we need.

With me, I have moments that are a bit rough when it comes to frustration or other things, though it's been having less and less of an effect on me over time, which is good, and I'm thankful for that.

As per my online friend from Canada, I haven't really been talking to her all that much, and I'm rather concerned and wondering if there's anyone else who can talk to her since I'm concerned as a matter of my own mental health due to some of the things she's been into (we both apparently have similar problems, though the difference is in whether or not there is recognition of there even being the problem), and I feel as though I don't have the strength and communication skills to address the matter. She also has a new online boyfriend that I don't know all that well, and if anything I feel too drained to handle the matter, even though I want to learn more and deal with it. Somehow I feel as though it's for me to keep my distance to avoid being consumed with the matter.

Is there anyone here who would like to try to be a friend while also keeping a bit of safe distance in boundaries? I'm not very good at setting boundaries aside from "stay away from x" and "don't x", so that's part of my concern.

Thank-you for your prayers. I appreciate it.

God has certainly been helping us in our lives, though we still wonder about what is coming up next.

~Peter M.

[1over137]

[FlawedIntellect]

Mom now has a boyfriend and she's got primary custody over my youngest sister, though ex-Dad is still not paying the spousal maintenance... We might be moving in with Mom's boyfriend since circumstances make it unlikely that we'll be able to keep staying in this house since we can't really pay the mortgage for the house payment. I feel that this is a bit controversial and concerning matters of morality, yet simultaneously seeing how circumstances are forcing us to make changes. Mom sold the T-Bird, finally, and now has a different car that's more reliable, but there's still some challenges here and my inability to really do much... She's also hoping to eventually find another job to continue to provide for us, hopefully a job that pays more.

If you would please pray on these circumstances, and also express the gratitude that in some ways things have been changing for the better, that would be great. Thank-you for your prayers for some of these things in the past. I appreciate it.