Please help me. Please.

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Fliegender
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Please help me. Please.

#1

Post by Fliegender » Sat Mar 27, 2021 8:22 am

Hello,

I don’t know what to do and need some advice. Please. I’m pregnant with my boyfriend’s baby but I know for a fact that he’s cheating on me. How can I know if the baby is mine or the other woman’s ?
"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#2

Post by RickD » Sat Mar 27, 2021 10:46 am

"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill
“I never met a person as stupid as a liberal who quotes me, and misspells my name.”

-John Stuart Mill
John 5:24
24 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life.


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Fliegender
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Re: Please help me. Please.

#3

Post by Fliegender » Sat Mar 27, 2021 11:24 am

RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 10:46 am
"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill
“I never met a person as stupid as a liberal who quotes me, and misspells my name.”

-John Stuart Mill
You’re right! I actually have J.S. Mill’s works here (On The Liberty Of Thought And Discussion, On Individuality As One Of The Elements Of Well-Being, On The Limits To The Authority Of Society Over The Individual . Mill certainly had a knack for long-winded titles. As such, his middle name should have been Stewart.

And what about my problem? Are you going to help me or just nitpick the spelling some forgotten author’s name?
"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#4

Post by RickD » Sat Mar 27, 2021 11:51 am

Ok, ok. Settle down.
My best suggestion is a “sister wives” type of living arrangement. That way you can both assume the baby is yours, all while keeping the stud happy.

Next time, you may want to try inserting lily root and rue into your nether regions before coitus. It used to work in medieval Western Europe.
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Fliegender (Sat Mar 27, 2021 1:11 pm)
John 5:24
24 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life.


The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe.



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Re: Please help me. Please.

#5

Post by Fliegender » Sat Mar 27, 2021 1:16 pm

RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 11:51 am
Ok, ok. Settle down.
My best suggestion is a “sister wives” type of living arrangement. That way you can both assume the baby is yours, all while keeping the stud happy.

Next time, you may want to try inserting lily root and rue into your nether regions before coitus. It used to work in medieval Western Europe.
Oh, thank you so much! I’ll talk to the other woman and see if it’s okay with her.

You give such common sense advice...may I trouble you with another dilemma of mine?

I stubbed my toe on a chair and inadvertently said Damn! Now I’m worried sick that I blasphemed the Holy Ghost! Do you think I’ve committed the Immovable Sin? Please, I need help.
"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#6

Post by RickD » Sat Mar 27, 2021 1:47 pm

Fliegender wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 1:16 pm
RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 11:51 am
Ok, ok. Settle down.
My best suggestion is a “sister wives” type of living arrangement. That way you can both assume the baby is yours, all while keeping the stud happy.

Next time, you may want to try inserting lily root and rue into your nether regions before coitus. It used to work in medieval Western Europe.
Oh, thank you so much! I’ll talk to the other woman and see if it’s okay with her.

You give such common sense advice...may I trouble you with another dilemma of mine?

I stubbed my toe on a chair and inadvertently said Damn! Now I’m worried sick that I blasphemed the Holy Ghost! Do you think I’ve committed the Immovable Sin? Please, I need help.
Oh my! That’s a damn shame awful!

As grievous of a sin as that is, there is hope:

29 Now if your right eye is causing you to sin, tear it out and throw it away from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand is causing you to sin, cut it off and throw it away from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell.

You need to promptly remove the offending toe*. Be sure you get the entire toe.

I speak from experience so I know what I’m talking about. A while back, I was helping a friend build a shed. We’d been working all day and we were starting to get tired. My friend was holding the nails, as I was hammering them. I “accidentally” hit his thumb with the hammer, and he let out the most vile curse words. I immediately took the wood chisel out of my pocket, and severed his thumb. I’ve never seen someone so thankful in my life! He says he’s indebted to me forever now! It makes me feel good that I can help my friends!

* You have a second option. I can simply pray for you. It won’t do anything to help you, but it will make me feel special to say that I’m praying for you.
John 5:24
24 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life.


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Re: Please help me. Please.

#7

Post by Nessa » Sat Mar 27, 2021 4:17 pm

Perhaps more suitable for the humour section instead of making light of any genuine requests for prayer :ewink:

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#8

Post by RickD » Sat Mar 27, 2021 6:23 pm

Nessa wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 4:17 pm
Perhaps more suitable for the humour section instead of making light of any genuine requests for prayer :ewink:
Maybe a bored moderator can move this to the proper section.
John 5:24
24 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life.


The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe.



St. Richard the Sarcastic--The Patron Saint of Irony

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#9

Post by Fliegender » Sat Mar 27, 2021 7:34 pm

RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 1:47 pm

As grievous of a sin as that is, there is hope:

29 Now if your right eye is causing you to sin, tear it out and throw it away from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand is causing you to sin, cut it off and throw it away from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell.

You need to promptly remove the offending toe*. Be sure you get the entire toe.
You’re right, I must chop off my toe. I’m not afraid to repent my toe. I have the axe ready but what happens if I have a miscarriage due to the pain? If it’s my baby in me or if it’s the other woman’s baby growing in me, would that be murder? I don’t want to commit the Unprotracted Sin by repenting!
wrote: * You have a second option. I can simply pray for you. It won’t do anything to help you, but it will make me feel special to say that I’m praying for you.
Yes, please prey for me! Thank you so much for your precious wisdom.
"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#10

Post by Nessa » Sat Mar 27, 2021 11:36 pm

RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 6:23 pm
Nessa wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 4:17 pm
Perhaps more suitable for the humour section instead of making light of any genuine requests for prayer :ewink:
Maybe a bored moderator can move this to the proper section.
I'm bored reading this but alas, I'm not a mod :shakehead:

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#11

Post by Fliegender » Sun Mar 28, 2021 8:29 am

RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 6:23 pm
Maybe a bored moderator can move this to the proper section.
This is the proper section. I’ve asked you to prey for me.

How come you were terminated as Bored Moderator?
"I never said that all conservatives are stupid people but it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
-John Stewart Mill

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#12

Post by RickD » Sun Mar 28, 2021 9:34 am

Fliegender wrote:
Sun Mar 28, 2021 8:29 am
RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 6:23 pm
Maybe a bored moderator can move this to the proper section.
This is the proper section. I’ve asked you to prey for me.

How come you were terminated as Bored Moderator?
I wasn’t terminated. But I’m not going to get into this subject here. You can pm me if you really want to know.
John 5:24
24 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life.


The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe.



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Re: Please help me. Please.

#13

Post by Nessa » Sun Mar 28, 2021 12:26 pm

Fliegender wrote:
Sun Mar 28, 2021 8:29 am
RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 6:23 pm
Maybe a bored moderator can move this to the proper section.
This is the proper section. I’ve asked you to prey for me.
Even the almighty can only do so much...

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Re: Please help me. Please.

#14

Post by Nessa » Sun Mar 28, 2021 12:29 pm

RickD wrote:
Sun Mar 28, 2021 9:34 am
Fliegender wrote:
Sun Mar 28, 2021 8:29 am
RickD wrote:
Sat Mar 27, 2021 6:23 pm
Maybe a bored moderator can move this to the proper section.
This is the proper section. I’ve asked you to prey for me.

How come you were terminated as Bored Moderator?
I wasn’t terminated. But I’m not going to get into this subject here.
But why not? It's the wrong section to post in so should be fine...

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